Horray for Boobies!!!

Last night I went out for Mardi Gras in downtown Harrisburg hoping to get some good photos. The local radio stations were out in full force whoring their stuff. WTPA and WINK had their tents out on the sidewalks. Hardware Bar had a tent set up at the parking garage area. I had my hopes up that I should be able to get some good shots. The Hardware Bar was packed. Unfortunately it was about 90% guys. The females there weren’t worth the charge on my batteries. I did catch most of Screamin Daisys first set. They were on fire and had the crowd pumped up. I give two thumbs up to Missy for doing a great job on stage while looking to be about 5 months pregnant.

If you go to the Hardware Bar you should know about Dennis. He’s the big guy that sweats like a pig while doing some horrible dancing in his sunglasses. Well last night I saw this old guy, looked to be about 60 and caught up in a never ending Saturday Night Fever movie. He was glidin and slidin trying to lure someone to dance with him. Finally someone did. A drunkin cow, but I’m sure he could care less. I often wonder what these people do during the day.

I couldn’t believe what the bartenders and servers were wearing. Lingerie would be a stretch. More like ass panties and a bra with garters and stockings. Of course I appreciated the eye candy while checking out the crowd. My server was practically “falling out” of her top. However, I was bothered by the server walking through the crowd of perverts. From her facial expressions I could tell some were getting a cheap thrill groping her while she held the drink tray high. Maybe it’s my age showing, but come on guys is that really necessary. How desperate are you to rub against or grab someone?

I guess that’s why I and a bunch of other people enjoy Twisted Tuesdays. You get real people that are out to have a good time without the freak show. In case you didn’t hear Twisted Tuesday will be back for our 4th year at the Hardware Bar starting on April 4th. Bo Bim and The Gorgonites are set to start this year’s concert series. Same format as before except the doors will open at 9:00pm instead of 8:00pm. I hope to have the full schedule line up ready within the next week or two. So keep an eye on our Home Page for the full details.

My last “On My Mind” article really fired up the masses. 74 emails were sent to me regarding the article. That has to be a record for as long as I can remember. Surprisingly none were negative. One email that caught my attention was from an out of town band. Their city has a unique way of venues paying bands. When booking a show you are guaranteed $100.00. You are also given up to 100 tickets. If you want to make money, you sell them. If you don’t, you can give them away. (There is no door list) The door is split 50/50 (venue/bands) day of show. In theory a 2 band show should have a minimum of 200 people. They mentioned I’d be surprised at how many shows have less than 100 people there. Also that 25 of the 100 are bar “regulars” so two bands with 100 tickets each to sell or giveaway only brought 75. I replied back, doesn’t surprise me but I’m glad to see it’s just not Central PA bands that are lazy.

I’m guessing things will be changing soon with bands and venues. Every time I talk to a venue owner that has live entertainment they always have a few stories to tell. Most are the “they said they would draw “X” amount and only ended up with “X” amount”. Of course every excuse under the sun was blamed for the lackluster show.

I’m getting a ton of emails from bands looking to be part of the Twisted Tuesday shows. They are all the same. “Hey we want to play! Check us out at My Space….! We’re already booked at blah, blah, blah! “ I reply with a simple email. How many people could you bring to the show? Most don’t reply back. Others once again hype the fact they the can “PACK” the place. Again I reply back. How many people (an actual number) can you bring to the show? I guess that’s a confusing question because most don’t reply back. The one’s that do, now add the “Well Tuesday Nights would be hard since everyone we know has day jobs, but I’m sure we could get people out to the show.” Again I reply back, this time I try to help them with an answer. Under 20, 20+, 50+ people? Since I actually asked for a commitment that usually weeds out the rest.

If you’re in a band, take this bit of advise. Don’t get into the habit of blowing smoke up peoples asses. Honesty in this business does go a long way. You pull a fast one on a venue owner, word will get out. Your one victory will turn into many defeats in time.

Sort of on the same subject. I’m surprised how bands are now basing crowd turnout on their My Space account. I had one band boost of their “page views”, “songs played”, “1000’s of friends” etc. So I clicked on their link to see most of their friends were hot chicks from all over the world, other bands from all over the world plus no shows were scheduled and their comments section was littered with spam(other shows) and “Thanks for the add” from their “friends”. I’m not college educated, so maybe that’s why I can’t understand the math being used for this type of calculation.

Maybe the state should have a permit type thing for bands. If you want to form a band that plays out you need to apply for a permit. Before you get the permit you must attend a class on promotions, bookings, etc. and take a test. Your final score will determine if you get a permit or not. What I’ve seen in the past 6+ years, I’m guessing 50% of Central PA bands would not get that permit. Take a deep look at your own self and honestly evaluate what 50% side your band falls in. It’s never to late to take a deep look and make a few changes to hop over to the other side.

Finally, before I forget, MMC10 is taking band showcase submissions. Go to www.hbgonline.com/mmc for more details.

Well that’s enough for now, got to do some research for the next “Porn Flick Review”.

Lator Gators!!! - BigJim